the tail that wags the dog

Over the course of our pre-baby years together, my husband and I adopted four dogs. I rescued a beagle just weeks before we met (Shanti), we adopted a Siberian husky puppy several months into dating (Montana). Later, during our engagement we rescued an adult beagle from the pound on the day of her slated termination (Madison) and shortly after our marriage, rescued a little cattle dog mix puppy (Sunshine). Then we went about the business of having kids. In many ways, having dogs prepared us for children--we are accustomed to working as a team to care for them, and we long ago gave up the luxury of staying out late on weekend nights. So the demands of parenting were in some ways less of a shock to our system than if we had not had our menagerie.

They are a pack of sweet, affectionate animals. They are loving and gentle with our daughter, who likes to pull their tails and slap them on the rump. In all ways they are good natured, tolerant and wonderful with her. I unabashedly adore our dogs. Still, I'd be lying if I said that having four animals living in my home is a cakewalk. The hair. The barking. The occasional accident. The feeding, grooming, dog poo cleanup (you cannot imagine the upkeep in that department) and the need for exercise. Which brings me to my point today...dog walking.

Giving four dogs the exercise they need isn't easy. Especially when at least one (Madison) is a recalcitrant barker. Walks can, and have, gone from calm and pleasant experiences to unadulterated chaos in a matter of minutes. I've used every possible combination of leash and harness, and experimented with every combination of dogs. Walking all four is impossible. Walking two at a time is doable with the right combination of equipment and dog pairing. I won't go into the details and bore you. Suffice it to say, I don't always enjoy walking them, even though I know they need it and fresh air is good for everybody. Some days when I think about what it takes to get out the door I give up before I even start.

But it's a new year, and I'm trying to reframe things in my mind. Instead of "should-ing" myself about taking them, and beating myself for being a bad doggie mom when I don't, I've decided to look at things a bit differently. Yes, walking them is a pain, mostly because of the extensive preparation needed to get out the door. But I've done this enough times to know there is a systematic way to get the baby and myself dressed, the stroller prepped and the dogs, two at a time, leashed and ready to go (the other two get a treat which keeps them from rushing me at the door while I'm trying to get out). I have started to focus on the ways in which the walk benefits the baby and me in addition to the dogs. If I can focus even a little on what I'm getting out of the deal, I find it easier to do. Fresh air helps me sleep at night, and the motion lulls the baby to sleep. Taking us all for a walk guarantees her an afternoon nap, and we avoid the crying and hysterics that often accompany that ritual. Plus, she gets to see and interact with the natural world and the passing seasons. At the end of it, we all feel better. Add a dash of unseasonably warm January weather, and what is normally an unpleasant chore becomes a joyful way to spend part of an afternoon. With a little reframing, I think I may even want to do it again tomorrow.

I think our yoga practice is quite similar. Maybe we psych ourselves out of going to class or unrolling our mat on the living room floor. Maybe we tell ourselves we're too tired, or it's just too much work, or it hurts, or costs too much money or time or whatever. It's so easy to do this. I don't know about you, but I can talk myself out of anything. Especially things I know to be good for me (funny, it's not as effective with Oreo cookies, diet Coke or really bad television...). And letting my inner taskmaster berate me for not going never got me off the couch either. Positive motivation, like thinking about how good I'll feel afterwards, seems to work much better. And amazingly, if I can just get my feet on the mat and take a few deep breaths, the motivation to practice appears. Like magic.

As I sit here writing this, all four of my dogs are enjoying their post-walk sleep and my well rested daughter is playing quietly next to me. All thanks to a little change of heart and mind. Small shifts can make a world of difference.